Don’t join a Woman’s World: Let her enter yours

Don’t join a Woman’s World

Don't join a Woman's World

Joining a woman’s world will always put you in a weak position in any kind of relationship.  You need to let her enter your world.

This article applies most to men with girlfriends / wives, but it also applies to any man who has a girl that he sees regularly and likes to a degree.  If you’re a player seeing multiple women, then it still applies, but you shouldn’t enter a woman’s world since you’re already busy juggling so many different ones.

What entering a woman’s world means

So what do I mean by entering a woman’s world?  I mean entering her frame.

Frame

In the red pill community we often talk about having a masculine frame.  Frame is just the way you carry yourself in the moment and day to day.  If you always carry yourself in a masculine way, you’ll have a masculine frame.

We also can apply frame to conversation.  If two people are having a conversation, then the individuals are either one in persons frame, they each have their own frame, or they’re battling for whose frame is going to dominate.

Generally the 1st or the last one.   If they both have their own frame and aren’t battling for control, these are two very calm people who don’t care about controlling the other person.  While this sounds nice, most conversations simply aren’t like this.

Don’t enter her frame

don draper - turning a girl on

You should never enter a woman’s frame.  This doesn’t mean don’t talk to her or don’t show an interest.  But it means don’t match her energy or become feminine like her.  Don’t carry yourself in the way she does.  Because if you do, not only will you become more feminine and turn her off, you’ll start to look to her as your leader.

Think about it.  If you let her lead the way you carry yourself, you’ll begin to look to her for leadership in your life.

This is what happens to most guys when they become beta-ized.  It’s often found with oneitis, which is obsession with a girl.  However that can happen with any girl a man obsesses over.  When you enter a woman’s world and let her frame control how you act, you start to look to her to guide you.  Because you’ve already started to mirror her actions and energy.

It’s a massive mistake to do this.  If a girl liked you before, it wasn’t because you were the same as her.  It’s because you were different.  By matching her energy you start to become weak and feminine.  Feminine energy is strong with her.  But in a man whose dating a woman, you need to be more masculine with how you carry yourself.

By becoming more feminine in your frame, you start to put her on a pedestal.  Then you’ll be the one who always texts her first, always calls her, and is desperate for her attention instead of the other way around

This is where men continue to enter a woman’s world not just in conversation, but in their life plan.

Trying to plan your life according to her

women don't like nerds

Which is what happens when you try to plan your life according to a woman.  If you want to stay focused on your purpose and be the leader in your relationship, you need to let a woman jump aboard your ship.  You’re focused.  You’re building a business, career, or something that you’re driving towards in life.  A woman’s world is not even a forethought.  It’s your world.

And any woman you allow to come into your life is lucky to have a chance to jump aboard your ship.

But most men don’t think like this.  Instead they try to enter a woman’s world and plan their life according to their girlfriend / wife.

I see this all the time with guys asking me questions.  The most common example is men moving to a new state / city to be with a woman they’re dating / used to date.  It’s funny because I did this myself back in the day, and I thought I was the only one “willing” to do it.  Even though it was the biggest mistake of me entering a woman’s world, I thought I was doing right thing by putting in the effort.

And this only made it more difficult for me to lead the relationship from a point of strength.  It made following my purpose that much harder.  Because I was entering a woman’s world.  I was showing her “you’re more important than me because I’m willing to move to you”.

Now I get emails from men asking me about similar situations who have the same old beta mindset I did.  Don’t do it.

Women need to get on your schedule

She needs to move to you.

This is only one example of entering a woman’s world and planning your life according to hers, but it’s the one that I’m guilty of myself.

When you plan your life according to a girl, you’re going to put her in the dominant position.  Even if you are able to try and lead the relationship, you’re still going to feel like you invested more, which means you’re more desperate for a return on your investment than her.

You can’t enter a woman’s world.  Not if you want to lead the relationship and give yourself the best chance for success.

Why entering a woman’s world is wrong

Weakness will ruin relationships

If you enter a woman’s world, you’re setting yourself up for failure.  Deep down, two things will happen:

  • You’ll lose respect for yourself
  • She’ll lose respect for you

Both of these will damage the relationship and you’ll become weak.  When you lose respect for yourself, that’s the worst feeling in the world.  That’s how men become depressed and give up on life in the worst scenarios.  In the best scenario, you still feel like shit.

If you have self respect, you feel powerful and confident.  Self respect is everything.  At the end of the day, that’s all you really have as a man.  Self respect is the center of your masculinity.  If you lost everything you owned, but still had self respect, you’d be able to carry yourself like a man and push forward.

When you enter a woman’s world, you lose that self respect.  Or at least damage it.  It’s one thing to make sacrifices for a relationship.  That’s necessary if you’re in a long term relationship to a degree.  But it shouldn’t be you entering a woman’s world.  You might compromise by partying less or going out on a nice date with your girlfriend once in a while.  Maybe you do your hobbies a little bit less, especially if you have kids.  But that’s for the kids, not for your woman.

You’re not throwing everything out the window.  You’re still doing the things you want to do.

And you’re definitely still in the motherfucking gym, lifting to keep that body in peak condition.

Consequences of entering a Woman’s World are dire

If you give up the things that you love and that keep your manhood in tact – like lifting, working on your business, hobbies, and so on, then the consequences are dire.

You’ll enter a woman’s world and besides losing self respect, she’ll also lose respect for you.  Once she loses respect for you, her attraction will soon disappear as well.  And then you’ll email me saying “everything was going great with my girlfriend of 3 years and then out of nowhere she dumped me / cheated on me / left me for another man”.

In reality, things haven’t been going well.  She’s annoyed and turned off that you entered her world.  You’re always at home, you stopped grinding, you’re not in as good shape as when you met, and you have needy energy towards her.  By entering her world, she conquered you.  You lost sexual market value – at least in her eyes – and she’s been looking for a replacement.

Don’t let this shit happen to you.  Be on your motherfucking shit.

Let her enter your world

red pill relationship

Let women enter your world.

You still need to pursue sex with them when you’re meeting new girls.  You still need to put in some effort into relationships you have.  And if course you need to be fucking her like a pro and be the strong man she wants you to be.

But you need to have your own life that’s not centered around her.  So if women come in and out of your life then it’s no big deal.  Whether it’s your girlfriend or one of many girls you see, you know she’s not yours, it’s just your turn.  Of course during sex you can use dirty talk and tell her she belongs to you in order to get her addicted to you.  But deep down you know you can’t own a woman.

And therefore you don’t enter her world.  You have your world.

That means you have a path you’re headed down and you don’t change it for any particular woman.  This will build strength in the way you think and the way you act.  You’ll have respect for yourself and more women will also have respect and attraction towards you.  When they shit test you or challenge you, you’ll be able to easily pass their shit and dish it back.  It’s second nature when you don’t enter her frame.  It’s your frame because it’s your world.

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