Going out alone vs going out with friends?

Going out alone vs going out with friends?

Going out alone vs going out with friends? - ryan gosling

Should you be going out alone or go out with friends?

Your end goal is to probably get at girls.  I’ll tell you right now that if you change your goal to just have a good time, you’ll probably meet girls regardless.  You’re going out for a good time, and you’re open to meeting girls if it happens.  That’s the best intention to have to be cool like a player and actually just enjoy yourself.

Nevertheless, many of you aren’t at that point and just want to get some ass.  I get it.  So I’ve written this article on going out alone compared to going out with friends in order to give you some advice.

In general, I’ve generally had better results going out with friends.

When you have a group of cool guys, you have good energy and can just have a good time.  And this results in meeting girls more often than not.

However, the key is to have the right group of guys.  If they’re all decent to high smv guys like yourself, but also genuine good guys that won’t try to steal a girl, cockblock, leave you without a ride, fuck your girlfriend given the chance, etc., then you’re in good hands.

Advantages of Going out with Friends

Let’s get into specifics.

Going out with friends has a lot of advantages, especially if you have the right group of guys.

  1. You don’t need to worry about getting girls, which in turn will make you more attractive.
  2. Social proof
  3. You won’t have scenarios where you look lonely

1.  You don’t need to worry about getting girls, which in turn will make you more attractive

When you’re going out with friends, you don’t need to worry about getting girls nearly as much.  Sure, your guy friends will probably make jokes about whose going to get at the hottest girl in the club or whose going to drink too much.  But all jokes aside, you can actually just get drinks with your bros, talk shit, and enjoy the night.

You won’t be as worried or feel pressure to meet chicks.  Instead you can get shots, talk about good times, and enjoy the music.

2.  Social proof

going out with friends - social proof

When you go out with friends, you automatically have social proof.  There’s clear evidence that you have friends and aren’t a weirdo.

This doesn’t necessarily add a ton directly to your sexual market value.  You do that by increasing your looks, money, and status, and by being seen with hot women.  However, being seen with a group of cool guys still validates to other girls that you’re a socially cool guy too.

If your friends are weird, thirsty, or losers, then it’s going to bring your value down.  But if they’re normal or above average guys, it’ll bring your value up.  Ideally you don’t want to be surrounded by all studs who are way above you, as that will make it harder to girls to meant to choose you versus them.  Instead it’s better to get guys around your level, either a little above and below.  That being said, having attractive friends can still help validate you and get your foot in the door.  Don’t avoid going out with a good friend because you think he’ll pull more ass than you.  He’ll probably get more attention, but there will be more groups of girls that will talk to him and also you.  Plus it makes you more attractive by default.

Regardless, girls care about social proof.  If you have friends then you’re showing to the world that people actually enjoy your company, which makes women feel more comfortable in letting you talk to them.

3.  You won’t have scenarios where you look lonely

If you’re not used to going out alone, then you’re going to be in situations where you look lonely.  It’s hard to go out alone when practically everyone else goes out with friends.

Most guys who start to go out alone eventually quit and stop going out all together until they can get their guy friends to come out again.

However, if you want to meet women independently or you travel, you still need to know how to go out alone.

Advantages of Going out Alone

Going out alone, while not my preferred way of enjoy the night, still has perks.  And as a man whose on his purpose with his business, there will be few free times for you to go out.  Especially in the beginning stages of your business.  Which can mean that when you finally have some free time to go out, you’ll have to go out alone due to a smaller social circle.

You might also be traveling to new countries where you have no friends, new cities within your country, or want to go out when all of your friends are busy.  So going out alone is still a valuable skill to have.

Going out alone has an advantage in that you can

  1. Go out when you want
  2. Choose the venue
  3. Don’t need to worry about ditching your bros for a girl

1.  Go out when you want

cold approach vs high value game

Going out alone means you can go out when you want.  If your friends are busy or don’t want to go out then that doesn’t mean you can’t have a good time.  You can still go out alone and enjoy yourself.  The feeling of knowing you’re going to have a good time with friends or without is powerful.  Of course it’s nice to go out with your bros and have a good time.

But abundance mentality doesn’t apply to just options with women.  It also applies to many areas of your life, including male friends.  When you’re not desperate for your friends to go out with you,  you’ll stay on good terms with them.  While not as extreme as with girls, you can still push your bros away if you’re too  pushy to always try and make them do what you want to do.

There will be nights when your bros don’t want to go out, aren’t in town, have other plans, or have responsibilities.  Having the power of going out alone makes you a better friend and gives you the option to have a good time regardless of your friends.

2.  Choose the venue

Going out alone allows you to choose the venue you want to go to.  You and your friends may have different preferences of night life options.  Some friends might like clubs, others may like bars, and some make like lounges.  Choosing the venue can even come down to preferences on the district or neighborhood of the city you’re in.

Although it’s not too big of a deal to compromise, going out alone gives you full control of where you decide to go.

3.  Don’t need to worry about ditching your bros for a girl

how to get one night stands

Given the chance you do meet a girl, you have the best chance at pursuing things if you went out alone.  Your bros  might not care if you ditch them for a girl.  But if you drove, then ditching them can mean they don’t have a ride.  If they drove, you might not have a  way to get back home.  If you all live in a city then you can avoid this particular issue.

The main point here is that logistics with friends can cockblock you if you don’t plan it out right.  You don’t want to have to ditch your bros or leave them in a bad position if you meet a girl and try to take her home.  However, this can be a non-issue if you work out logistics with your friends ahead of time.

Best way to go out alone

The best way to go out alone without feeling weird is to go out dancing – like at a salsa / bachata / or some kind of dance.  I do Latin dance so that’s what I choose.  And I usually go out dancing alone.  This of course requires you know how to dance, which if you’re a regularly reader you know that I highly recommend you guys learn how to do.   It’s something I actually enjoy whether I meet girls or not.  And having that attitude of having a good time + being in an environment where you’re  consistently meeting new girls = doing well with women.

At the end of the day, it’s up to you how you want to go out.  I go out out alone all the time because I like to dance salsa and because I travel.  It’s still essential that you can have a good time by yourself so you can live life on your own terms.  However, I’d be lying if I said I had the best time going out alone.  While I can enjoy myself and meet girls, I tend to have the best time when I go out with friends and try to enjoy each other’s company.  Some men prefer one versus the other, but there are times to do both when you’re a young man looking to explore the world after the sun has set.

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