How to Remain Detached from a Woman

How to Remain Detached from a Woman

How to Remain Detached from a Woman

Knowing how to remain detached from a woman is one of the most important things you do when you’re dealing with females.  Women are fickle, change their minds, and could drop you at any moment.  It’s just how they are.  Especially if you are just getting to know them and they haven’t build a strong connection with you.

You need to be able to remain detached from a woman so you’re not always so desperate to make things work with each girl.  Otherwise you’re going to continually drive women away.

I get tons of comments on my she never texts first article, as well as emails around the same topic of men becoming too needy way too early on.  A ton of guys become attached to women they just started texting, and in some cases haven’t even fucked.   And even with the guys who have, a lot of them are getting attached within a month or two of seeing a girl.  It’s ridiculous.

We’ve all been there.  But hopefully you’re past that bullshit.  If you’re not, then this article is going to help you to remain detached from a woman so you don’t fuck things up.

Remaining detached vs. feeling nothing

It’s not that you can’t have any attachment to women ever.  If you’re dating a girl for years or you have kids together, there’s going to be some level of attachment.

Even then it needs to be limited, and needs to be less than the woman’s attachment for you.   But after a lot of time spent together, there’s going to be some level of attachment.   And even if you just started seeing a woman, it’s natural to like her and want to keep seeing her.

However you can never be super attached to a woman.  And for those of you who are trying to get laid or get a girlfriend with a girl you just recently met, you absolutely must remain detached.  This ensures you act like a player, don’t become desperate, and actually allow the girl to become attached to you.  If you don’t remain detached from women, then you’re going to act in ways that turn them off and fuck up your relationships.

So how do you remain detached from a woman?  There’s a few things you need to do:

  1. Invest Less – Monetary and mentally
  2. See multiple women
  3. Keep your purpose as your #1 priority
  4. Create easy access to other women
  5. Stay true to your values
  6. Be willing to cut her off

1. Invest Less – Monetary and mentally

player with women, confident

You’re always emotionally connected to what you invest your resources into.  The more money and/or mental energy you put into something, the more attached you become.  With each individual woman, make sure to invest little to no money at first – cheap dates, and invest less mental effort than her.  Better yet, if you can get her to invest earlier on, she’ll grow an attachment towards you.

You’ll have to approach her at first and initially put a little more effort with setting up the date.  That’s the masculine drive to go after what he wants.

But it should be hot and then colder.  You need to let the woman put more effort in.  This is essential for getting her to actually like you and become invested.  And you’ll also remain detached because you won’t be constantly investing effort.

Some initial effort

Obviously you invest a little bit of effort at first, but this needs to be less effort than her once you two start talking.  You’re talking the risk in approaching or starting things off because she can shoot you down.  So in most situations you’re going to be in the weaker, more invested position.  However your goal is to switch this dynamic as soon as possible.  If you approach women who choose up on you, meaning they show interest to begin with, then this will be much easier to do.  If you cold approach, it can still happen, but your ratio of getting girls to like you and invest more will be much lower.

The key is to remember that the less you invest, the less you care.  Learning how to remain detached from a woman starts off early on.  Put a little effort in first, and then make her chase you.

2. See multiple women

Dating multiple women

It’s easy to remain detached from a woman when you’re sleeping with multiple at the same time.  Especially if they’re all attractive and turn you on.  Relationship guys will have to use other tactics on here and not take advantage of this.

But for all of you single men, you need to be seeing multiple women.  Even if you’re busy and can only see 2 or 3 women at a time, that’s still way better than one.  You can’t become attached to a girl when you’re not even in a relationship with her yet.  That’s going to put her in the leadership position and fuck things up.

You can prevent this from happening by seeing other women.  This way you’ll have a real abundance mindset and will act in the right way which each girl you see.  And then if one wants to lock you down, you can decide to be exclusive with her or not.

It’s important to keep in mind that if you’re seeing a a 9 and two 6’s, you’re going to become attached to the 9.  Which is why you need to keep your standards high.  If you know you can pull 8’s and 9’s, then don’t fuck with 6’s.  In this case I’d make an exception and say it’s better to fuck one 8 or 9 then fuck a bunch of 6’s on the side.  However if you can get one 8 or 9, you should be able to get more with some effort.

3. Keep your purpose as your #1 priority

Before women, you need to have a purpose.  That’s going to give you financial freedom and choices in life.  Whether you’re a player in the game or have a girlfriend of 10 years, your purpose needs to be #1.  When this actually becomes true for you, you’ll be able to remain detached from a woman for real.  At least enough to never be desperate.  Of course if you have a girlfriend or wife of many years, there will be some attachment.

But you won’t be so attached that you’ll put up with bullshit and let the relationship fall apart.  Because you’ll have a purpose, you’ll be able to not become weak over the relationship.  Which means you’ll be able to maintain it much more effectively.  Women love strong men.  They can only respect strong men.  As men, we’re strong when we have a purpose.  You can make a business a purpose or providing for your kids your purpose, but you  can’t make being in a relationship with a woman your purpose.

Remain detached from a woman by having a purpose greater than her.

4. Create easy access to other women

man working out, increasing smv

It’s great to have multiple women if you’re single.  But some men still become needy and attached to a woman when they lose the other women.  Likewise, there are married men who still know they can get other women if they had to, and therefore they can be more effective in managing their relationship.

That’s how you want to be no matter what.  Whether you’re fucking 4 different women or you’re tied down, you need to have access to other women.  This doesn’t mean you need to cheat on your wife or add more girls to the team when you can only handle 3 or 4 at once.  But it means you know you can get more women if need be.

And the easier, the better.

Getting access to more women

You get easy access to women through status, ability to get women (game), or just high sex appeal.  Ideally all of them.  If you have some status locally by owning a business or being good at something, you’re going to have an easier time getting women in your area.  Or you can have game.  Meaning you were able to get laid a lot in the past, learn how to flirt with women, talk with them, and get them to do what you want.  Basically you’re good with women.  An experienced man can have a relationship but will remain detached from a woman to a degree because he knows he can get other women if they break up because he’s done it before.  Or you just have huge sex appeal from looking good + feeling confident.

If you get all 3 of these, then you’ll have plenty of women who will be lining up to be with you.

Like I said, this applies to men in relationships who may not be dating other women.  But knowing you can get other women if you need to break her off will help you remain detached.

5. Stay true to your values

value - ceo - businessman

As men, we need to have values.  A purpose makes us strong.  And values is what makes us men in the first place.  Values doesn’t necessarily mean you’re a good man, or a bad man.  It just means you have things that are important to you that you don’t sacrifice.  Especially just to get some ass.

We usually think of hero’s as having values.  Or good men.  And while that’s true, in real life it’s usually the bad boys who have values.  They may not value community service or family life.  But they value their goals, ambitions, and plans.  This allows them to be firm in what they’re doing.  And it creates masculine energy.

Determine your own values

You need to create values for yourself.  Your own code.  Having a purpose that’s your #1 priority can be one of your values.  You can have a specific value that you don’t spend more than $50 on a date with a woman unless you’ve been fucking for x amount of time.  Or $20 if you don’t live in an expensive western city.  Doesn’t matter the exact amount, it matters that you have a code.  You have values.

I know what I put in is what I get back.  Which is why I put in work in this business.  Putting in work is something I believe in.  It’s something I value.

You can also have specific rules in a relationship that are part of your values.

Your values are the things you place importance in.  If you have nothing you care about, then naturally you’ll become attached to any decent looking woman that comes into your life.  But you can remain detached from a woman if you create your own values and stick to them.

6. Be willing to cut her off

power in relationships, man walking away from woman

You must always be willing to cut a girl off.  That’s how you keep the power in the relationship.  Whether she’s a fuckbuddy or a wife.  You need to be willing to walk away.  With every girl you get involved with, there’s going to be a moment where you must walk away from her.  And if she’s going to be on your team, she’ll need to come back and apologize for her mistakes.

This means you must always be willing to risk losing a woman.  You will lose some.  But the ones who come back will be feminine, loyal, and submissive to you.  You’ll have the best relationships with them because they’ll know you aren’t so attached that you’ll compromise yourself for them.  Which turns them on and shows them your value as a leader.

A man whose willing to cut off a woman who needs to be cut off is a man whose able to remain detached from a woman enough to think clearly.

Remain detached to keep women feminine

You can have a great relationship with a beautiful woman whose more attached to you than you are to her.  But if you become more attached, she’ll lose interest.  She’ll either leave or become bossy and then leave.

If you want to have high quality experiences with women, you must remain detached.  It seems counter intuitive at first.  But once you are able to remain detached from a woman, you’ll be able to experience the best parts of her and get her to change the bad or get rid of her when need be.  Women will have more respect and love for you when you are less attached to them than they are to you.

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Sriram Shanmugasundaram

Awesome I have been following your blogs for 3 months I guess I have changed completely. Its awesome. Almost I would have a
Read all the blogs I think. Nowadays awaiting your blogs keep checking daily. Even if you are not writing any I usually check out the old ones. Become a fan.. Kudos