Get Respect By Becoming a Dangerous Man
If you want respect from other men and women alike, then you need to become a dangerous man. Even though I went with Scarface as the main photo, this doesn’t mean you become outwardly violent or mean to people. I’m all about having good energy and being positive. But nobody respects a weak man.
Jordan Peterson said it best
A harmless man is not a good man. A good man is a very dangerous man who has that under voluntary control.
And while Peterson was talking about being an actual good man versus a weak man, that also heavily applies to being respected. Other men can’t respect you if you’re a ball-less snake. Which means you’re more likely to get picked on, stepped on, and treated poorly.
And women won’t respect you, let alone sexual interest. If you have kids then they won’t be able to have a good role model because all they’ll see is a weak man. You need to become a dangerous man in order to get respect from those around you. You’ll never be the most dangerous man in the world. But you need to be dangerous enough to be respectable. No, you don’t need to have a badass scar or walk around in a matrix trench-coat. However, you do need to be a masculine man who stands his ground.
Become a dangerous man but still be a positive person?
Is this possible while still being a cool, fun dude who enjoys life? Yes. Here’s a few things you can do that will make you a dangerous man, but still don’t require you to be a fucked up person.
- Ability to fight / defend yourself
- Ambition / success
- Abundance mindset
1. Ability to fight / defend yourself
Learning how to fight is one of the most important skills you can learn as a man. Admittedly, it won’t help you grow a business or get tons of women directly. But knowing how to fight can potentially save your life in bad situations. And it can give you the confidence to defend those around you if ever need be.
Most of the time, just knowing how to fight will allow you to be firm yet level headed in sketchy scenarios, which will decrease the chance of something happening. Men are much less likely to fuck with another man who shows he’s not a bitch.
You don’t want to go out of your way to fight people. Because a fight could leave you dead, injured, or in jail. That being said, knowing how to fight is still an essential skill you must have if you want to be a dangerous man. We live in a tough world. And while you can avoid most bad situations, you’ll want to have the ability to defend yourself if need be.
A different kind of confidence
And even in situations where you don’t need to defend yourself, you won’t feel “out alpha’d” by bigger, or tougher looking dudes than you. Weak men often try to compensate for weakness by trying to talk shit about stronger men they perceive as threat physically or in the sexual market place. But when you know that you can fight, even though there isn’t any need for example at a friendly house party, you’ll carry yourself in a different way. You’ll carry yourself like a dangerous man.
The best way to learn how to fight is to take mma, boxing, muay thai, bjj, or wrestling. You don’t need to be an expert. A few years of bjj and then boxing or just mma will give you a solid foundation.
The mental edge that knowing how to defend yourself and your friends / family gives you is insane. It allows you to be comfortable yet still a dangerous man. Add some weight lifting to give yourself a more muscular appearance, and you’ll be physically a dangerous man.
2. Ambition / success
So you’ve nailed the physical part about becoming a dangerous man. But becoming this type of guy who can’t be controlled or bullied goes beyond just that. It’s also about, and maybe even more so about, becoming a dangerous man in your lifestyle. This means that you walk around like a boss because no one controls you.
And how do you do this? Well you become dangerous by actually becoming a boss. You start your own business. Whether it’s just you and you’re your own boss or you eventually hire employees is up to you.
But the energy of a man who runs his own life makes him a dangerous man. He won’t be pushed around by others and he’ll go after what he wants.
The looks like ambition in younger men and success in older men. If you’re 18-25, you don’t actually need to be successful. You just need to be on the path. The ambition you have to be a boss will give you that dangerous energy. However, while ambition is attractive, it needs to be matched by success eventually. Once you start getting 25-30, there needs to be some level of progress. And by the time you’re 30-40, you need to be on your way to bosshood. It’s always a journey. But you need to have success in order to actually be free to be a dangerous motherfucker. Success in this case is having your own business that makes you money and involves something you enjoy doing.
3. Abundance mindset
A dangerous man is dangerous because he doesn’t need anyone. He’s good on his own and he has other options. This applies to business, to dating, to his social circle, and so on.
What this does is allows up to be free to actually be authentic instead of trying to impress these people. He can be respected because he’s not trying to suck up to the people in his life.
And this aura of dangerousness allows him to give the best of himself to those around him. He can give his clients the best service because he’s not worried about criticism. He can be a masculine and caring boyfriend without being needy or too available. Or he can have fun dating these women and have real connections, but not act weird or desperate over one of them. He can have a good time with his friends and not make a big deal about it if one of them is busy or cancels.
All of these things come down to raising your confidence. You can artificially raise your confidence with positive self talk and affirmations – which I’m actually a fan of. This extremely powerful when you need a boost.
But what makes self talk even more powerful, is when it’s actually true. When you are actually re-affirming shit that’s happened. You get true confidence by getting success and then remembering that success.
When you learn how to fight, you know that you can handle a situation where someone is throwing punches or tries to grapple with you on the ground. When you’ve fucked a girl to get her addicted, you have the confidence to not ask her if she cummed or to actually let her text you first after you’ve started to see each other. And when you sign your first few clients in business, you have the confidence to know you can do it again.
Raising your confidence will make you a dangerous man that people respect. Confidence is a huge deal. However, you’re not going to get it by doing nothing. It’s a combination of remembering your successes and feeling good about the future. If you put the work in to get better in the areas of life that you care about, then you’re naturally get more confident in time as you see your own progress.
Why get respect?
You can try to deny it, but as men we desire respect from others. From other men, from women we like or date, from friends in our lives. Without respect we feel unhappy. We feel like we’re not getting what we deserve. It’s a primal instinct. In the past, a respected man had less threats from other men and more sexual options. A less respected man had a greater chance of being killed by other men or having less options.
And although it’s not life or death for most people in today’s age, becoming a dangerous man + getting respect is still critical for social acceptance and satisfaction. You can say you don’t care about that, but it’s a lie. You may not need everyone to like you, but you want people to respect you.
Just like women need attention, men need respect. And you’re not going to get respect if you’re a man who can be stepped on. When you know how to defend yourself and others, have control over your income, and aren’t desperate for anyone, you become a dangerous man.
You can still have all good energy and show love to those in your life. But it comes from a place of choice, which is strong. A dangerous man gets respect because he isn’t subject to the will of others. Get control over your life and make your connections with people out of enjoyment rather than a need for acceptance, and you’ll become a dangerous man while still being a genuinely cool dude.