How to be Desired by Women
Tons of men want to know how to be desired by women. It makes sense. If you have a strong biological urge to have sex with women, then you want to figure out how to fulfill that urge.
And becoming the object of a desire is a smart strategy.
Because what most guys do is think with their small head instead of their big one. Meaning they just try to figure out how to get a nut off without actually realizing what the women want from them. This leads to guys being thirsty and chasing women. They go after what they desire, but it doesn’t seem to work out.
Pursuing vs Chasing
Chasing women is not the answer. Yet this is the main strategy the common man uses. It’s your job to make the first move, that’s fine. That’s pursuing. As the man, you will be the one to pursue the woman to begin. But that’s the difference. Chasing women means that you are making the first move, and the second, and the third, and so on.
Think of the word pursue. You think of a hunter carefully stalking his prey. Being slick, cool, calm, collected, yet aggressive and not afraid to make a move. But if the moment isn’t right, then he’ll hunt for new prey or will hunt another day. No moment is perfect, the hunter isn’t waiting for the perfect moment. Just for the moment that’s practical.
Now think of chase. You think of a man running recklessly after something. No smoothness, no precision, no elegance, no swagger, no self respect.
Chasing involves non stop pursuing no matter what. That’s a desperate hunter who barely eats. The hunter who is successful will pursue initially, but will close in on his target swiftly or will move on.
Meaning you can make a move, but if she’s not reciprocating early on, you bounce out of there. Simply as that.
Stop Chasing women
The problem is most guys aren’t willing to do that. They don’t go after the perfect prey, aka the women who show interest. Instead, they cold approach every girl they see. Or worse, message every girl they can on every online dating app. At least with the guys who chase in person, they’re willing to go up and make a move in real life.
Now with dating apps and lock down restrictions, the vast, majority guys chase by messaging a million girls hoping to get lucky.
This will yield results if done enough sheerly due to the numbers game. But it’s a game that has a massive cost. And that’s your attention, your pedestalization of women, destruction of your confidence + self respect, and a loss of all ability to be desired by women.
When you’re constantly chasing women, you’re putting them on a pedestal. It’s the default scenario. By constantly trying to message to get at every women that looks decent, you therefore establish in your subconscious mind that women are the prize.
If you want to be desired by women, stop chasing them. Doing that in it of itself will do wonders for you. If you were simply to delete all of your dating apps, avoid porn / masturbation, in a matter of time you’d have women start to take second glances at you.
Because the majority of men, as in 95%, are chasing women and / or releasing their seed to porn. The collective conscious of men is desperate for the feminine touch.
Chasing puts women on a pedestal ultimately:
- Lowers your value in her eyes and in your own eyes
- waste of time and energy
Women you chase will end up pursuing the guys they really like anyways. So why not become one of the guys women actually really like by forgetting about chasing women and instead chase life. That’s the key to learn how to be desired by women.
Actually Live and Enjoy your Life
If you actually live and enjoy your life, you will be desired by women on a level that you won’t even believe. It’s so simple, yet it’s the real answer. Actually just live your life and stop thinking sex or female attention is super valuable. When you realize that you are the most important thing in your life your whole aura will change. You’ll now exhibit the type of vibe that will attract women.
Now, if every single guy just enjoyed his life, then maybe you’d have to do more.
But the collective of men is so bent on making sex or women their main focus, that they chase it all day long. Even if they fail to act, as is the case with many masturbators, they’re still thinking of women all day. When they see an attractive women, they get nervous, then later on will think about how nervous they are and how they couldn’t make a move.
The guys who are okay with women will glorify their past “success” from that time they got laid off of tinder or the time a girl from a bar came home and blowed them. They still pedestalize women and sex in their mind as the best part of their life, and constantly wish they could recreate a few of their “victories”.
But the men who are truly desired by women, who have their choice of women to date or get in relationships with, are the men who simply live their own life. You can enjoy a good relationship, dating, or sex. But you don’t give it any great importance, especially the sex part. If a woman has earned a great role in your life, that’s good. However, even then, you’re not overcomplicating it or making it something that has to be clenched onto.
The Formula for being Desired by Women
Being desired by women as a man isn’t that hard. Given that you’re in decent shape, have good hygiene, and can function socially at a normal level, the rest of the formula is easy.
- Do Good work
- Hobbies you enjoy
- Post activities on social media (post and GET OFF)
Do good work. Create a specific purpose for yourself, or find work that you actually enjoy and believe is valuable. Do that work.
Outside of that, find time for a hobby or two. This can be a martial art, painting, surfing, camping, dancing, working on rockets, whatever you like. You may have 1 big hobby you enjoy, or a few small hobbies that are just nice additions to your life. These are the things that you can look forward to.
The third part of the formula is optional. Post on social media and then GET OFF. I emphasize this because spending time consuming content on social media will drain your attention, time, and energy. If you can’t help but check out women on IG or get lost just scrolling, then just don’t bother.
However, if you can post whatever you’re doing to an IG story or regular post, and then GET OFF, then social media can be a great tool. You’re showing off your life, and therefore creating desire in the network of women that you have.
You’ll never need to DM random women to try and get some action. Instead, women who like what you post will respond to a story or DM you. This is an easy way to leverage modern technology to work in your favor. If you have the discipline to post and GET OFF, with the exception of responding to women who interact with you, then you have it made.
You shouldn’t do things just to post on IG or social media. But if you’re doing things you enjoy, going on a trip, at your favorite bakery, etc., then might as well use this to your advantage.
Women will Give you Signals they want you
Whether you want to use IG / social media or not is totally optional and up to you. When you actually live your life, women will make themselves known to you that they’re interested. Because when you’re fully involved in life, and you’re retaining your seed, you become desired by women.
The signals will be fairly easy to spot:
- Real life: will look at you, smile at you or look down, walk closer to you, get more happy or more shy around you
- Social media: will respond to your stories on IG, will like pics days after, comment, etc.
Become the Best version of yourself
Women are desired by men just for looking good. However, while women like good looking men, they also desire a man whose fully involved in what he’s doing. They want that alpha energy.
Even as a good looking guy (or so I think), I’ve gotten just as many women with a shaven head and a beard, compared to when I look like a pretty boy.
Yes, you can be in great shape and you should be presentable. That’s a given.
However, if you really want to be desired by women then just live life. Women don’t desire the men who are desiring them. Your need to be desired by women is actually hurting you.
When you understand the words here, you put yourself first, and you enjoy your life all on your own, being desired by women will just be a side affect. And that’s how it should be. Stop making women the priority and make yourself the priority. Women will copy you and make you a priority.
I love your writing. Thank you for always emphasising on the mindsets we should develop instead of short fixes for problems.
Sure thing my man