How to Build Yourself up

How to Build Yourself up

Figuring out how to build yourself is a great first direction in becoming the strongest version of yourself.  Building yourself is a never ending process, but it’s particularly important in a man’s early years.  18-30 is the time for to really build yourself up and create momentum for your life.

Rising up and becoming better

Building yourself up is all about becoming better.  This is how you become an alpha male.  It starts with self improvement.  Learning how to build yourself up isn’t that complicated.  But it can be difficult.  It requires work.  If you’re starting from a low place the you’re going to have to put in more work.  That’s the bad news.  There’s good news though.  You can put in the work and build yourself up into the kind of man you want to be.  If you’re willing to take action, then knowing how to build yourself up will happen naturally.  You must be willing to rise up.

It’s about getting results at first.  That will come in time.  Figuring out how to build yourself up simply requires will power and consistency.

Building or decaying

I can get hot women but can't keep them

In life you’re either building or decaying.  In a physical sense, you can’t completely stop the decaying of your body.  You can however slow it down and maximize your physical potential to have great strength + health while you’re alive.  However, the other major areas of your life can always be improving.  You can still grow in wisdom, wealth, and in fulfillment as you age.  You can also widen your impact on other people the longer you’re here.

In order to help others, you first must build yourself up.  If you stay focused on building yourself, then you won’t need to worry about decaying.  You’re always doing one or the other, so focus on building.

Decide on areas you want to improve in

Simply decide on where you want to improve.  Your brain organizes different things i your life in different areas.  Like a computer with a hard drive.  If you want to fill up the hard drive and expand into into hard drives, you need to have content.  With the human brain, it’s best to build it up with different types of content.

Pick some areas you want to improve in.  When you work at these areas, your brain will develop new neural pathways.  Not only will you literally be building within your brain, but you’ll also be building yourself up as a man in life.  Common things you may want to focus on:

  • Want a lean, strong body
  • Be able to defend yourself
  • Get a girlfriend
  • Finances
  • Spiritually

Build yourself by Building a Foundation – Make Goals in that direction

how to be confident - man whiteboard goals

Learning how to build yourself up requires you start with a foundation.  Just like how a building is built.  It might seem like it takes months and months when a construction company gets started.  Most construction sites will take forever on the foundation.  It seems like the building never is going to be completed.   But then 9 months in, just as the foundation is done, it’s like the rest of the building is built within a few weeks.

So what happens?  Does the construction company start out lazy for 9 months and then all of a sudden get a huge burst of energy to finish the job?  No, not at all.  It’s just that the foundation is so important.  It takes months and months to build a solid foundation for a sizable structure.  Every brick must be laid with precision.  All of the dimensions need to be measured to a tee.  Any foundational mess ups can damage the integrity of the entire building.  That’s why it takes so long.  Because the foundation is everything.

Think of building yourself up similarly.  It takes a long time to build a foundation.  But that foundation is everything.  With a strong foundation, you’ll be able to build a solid building.  So don’t worry about progressing fast or rushing to get the result.  Slow down.  Instead, just focus on putting in effort every day.  Lay every brick as well as you can.  When you build a rock solid foundation, you’ll be building yourself into a rock solid man.

Foundations for the above goals can be as following:

  • Lift weights and Eat well
  • Take a martial arts class a few times a week
  • Talk to girls
  • Get a skill that will get you paid more
  • Read spiritual books, meditate

Lift weights and Eat well

man lifting weights

Lifting weights and eating well is key to getting a strong lean body.  Don’t focus on how to get the perfect upper chest when you just started working out last week.  Save that for 2 years into the game.  First just show up and hit your bench, squat, deadlift, and pull ups consistently.  Lift 3-4 times a week and make sure you’re eating right.  Eat lots of vegetables, protein, healthy fats, and cut out excessive sugar.  This is the foundation for getting a strong lean body.

Take a martial arts class a few times a week

boxing

If you want to get better at bjj or boxing, don’t focus on the intricate detail of Demian Maia or Floyd Mayweather.  Wait until you’re a few years in before you even start trying to incorporate the finesse of the masters.  Instead focus on the foundations.  Focus on keeping your guard from getting passed and passing guard in bjj.  Try to get tapped out less.  In boxing, work on your jab and you’re straight.  Work on your slips and keep your hands up.

Go to class a few times a week and stay consistent.  Figuring out how to build yourself up through martial arts can be a beautiful challenge.  You can learn incredible detail from the masters in your martial art, but not before you build a solid foundation.

Talk to girls

take control of your relationship

If you want to get a girlfriend, then don’t focus on wifing up the first girl that looks in your direction.   Building yourself up in dating doesn’t need to g from zero to 100.

Instead, focus on just talking to girls.  Get some dates.  Get to know different girls, flirt with them, and get some experience dating some different women.  Then you’ll start to see how you act around girls, what you need to work on, and what type of girls you like.  Then you’ll be in a better position to pick a high quality woman as your girlfriend.

Get a skill that will get you paid more

ways to invest in yourself, start a business

If you want to get your finances in order, then get a skill that will pay you more.  This can be a skill that

  • goes with your current skill set if you want a promotion
  • a skill that can get you a higher paying job
  • or a skill that will allow you to start a business + achieve financial freedom

Put in effort towards that skill everyday.  Maybe you are going back to school to learn a trade or get a masters degree.  Or you’re learning it online and teaching yourself.  Whatever it is, put in work at it everyday.  Some days you’ll put 4 hours into it, others you’ll put an hour int it.  Learning how to build yourself up requires that you are constantly gaining knowledge.

Read spiritual books, meditate

meditation

If you want to know how to build yourself up  as a man spiritually, then start reading some spiritual texts.  If you grew up in a certain tradition like Christianity, Islam, Buddhism, etc. and still follow that path then you can read the texts of your upbringing.  If you want to read texts from multiple traditions then you can do that as well.  Even if you’re not religious, there’s wisdom to be found in many of these texts that have been utilized by men for thousands of years.  It’s true that many men have used religion for evil, but the core messages that are found in many spiritual teachings can be useful in your life.

Meditation is also a great spiritual practice to build yourself up as a man.  It can help you to realize more about yourself and the universe you’re apart of.  Even if you think it doesn’t apply to you, many secular people discuss the benefits of meditation in their own lives.

Your current actions determine your future character

The things you do today will determine the man you become.  If you want to know how to build yourself up as a man, then you need to take actions that are going to progress your life.  Building yourself up simply requires that you take actions that will put you in a better position.  Do these actions consistently and you’ll build yourself into the man you want to be.

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