Meet Women Without Chasing Them
Wanting to meet women is a normal, natural, and healthy desire for a man. However, chasing women is a losing strategy.
Going out to night clubs / bars
We all know how draining and time consuming it can be to go parties or nightclubs 2-3x a week.
If you want to meet women consistently from going out, then you need to consistently go out. It’s not rocket science, it makes perfect sense. Nevertheless, it can be tiring to always be going out. This is a good strategy if you’re 18-22 or 18-24. But once you get to a certain age, you realize the massive waste of time that going out is on the rest of your life. It will yield you results in the dating game if you put the work in. It also helps you to understand and read people better. So there is some benefit to partying and going out.
The cost of always going out
But at what cost? For a man whose trying to build or expand a business, that cost is too great. For a man in his grind mode, the hours spent out kill you the next morning. And for any man with a 9-5 job whose working to escape the wage slave matrix, you need your Saturday’s and Sunday’s for work.
No seriously, you need them. These are days you can fully dedicate to grinding and working on that business. That’s 16-20 hours of work if you do 8 or 10 hour days each one. That’s enough to build passive income or a functional business within a few years of grinding.
I know this is a bit of rant, but this is the exact dilemma I faced. I enjoyed going out to meet women, and I still go out once in a while. I’m not against living life. But at the same time, consistently going out would always damage my productivity the next morning. Meeting women at nightclubs / bars was fun but isn’t the best strategy for a man in his grind mode of life.
What about dating apps?
Add dating apps on top of that, and now have a recipe for a massive waste of time and energy.
On one hand, dating apps make it easier than ever to meet women. That is, if you’re in the top 15-10% or higher. If you’re not in the top percentile of men in your local area, you’re absolutely and utterly fucked. The good news is that until you get to the top 10%, the competition is weak and most guys who do a monk mode for 6 months to a year can crack it.
Dating apps can be easy, but it still feels like a chore
I’ll admit, I’ve met tons of women from dating apps and it was the easiest dates/sex I ever had. However, it wasn’t particularly satisfying. Even though I screen out the women who aren’t interested and only deal with high interest women, it still feels like being on the app is draining. It’s like I’m still giving my attention to the tech conglomerates that own all of the dating apps.
There’s no escaping the matrix completely. After all, I’ve leveraged google and youtube extensively for my own success in business.
I even have a product (text game) where I show guys how to make online dating extremely easy and efficient.
So I’m not against using the dating apps from some sort of moral sense. If you’re a man in the top 10% in your area, it’s an objectively easy way to meet women.
However, it’s still draining. While I’m not chasing the women individually, I’m spending time on the dating app for the sole purpose of dating / sex.
Constantly going on another app, looking at the matches, responses, etc. is like the same dopamine hit you get when you get likes or views on social media. At some level, it just doesn’t feel right.
Quality is a bit lower online
And if we’re being honest, the quality of women online is lower.
Even if you’re in the top 10%, the quality you get online is going to be a little bit less than what you get in real life. Not saying it’s just ugly girls. There are plenty of cute women on the dating apps. But it’s not quite as good as real life.
Are there exceptions? Yes of course. A few of the most beautiful girls I’ve met were from dating apps. However, I ran a lot of numbers and they were the exceptions.
I’m not messing with ugly women, they’re still cute. But due to photoshop, perfect angles / lighting, and the fact that most attractive women don’t stay on dating apps for long, means that the quality is generally going to be a bit less.
The app is also biased only towards looks. Of course a man should looks max, as this helps out massively in dating and even career wise.
I noticed on dating apps I can always get a woman on my level or lower in terms of looks. It’d be much less common to get a woman that would be considered more attractive than me on the app. But in real life, this happens all the time. I can get women who might be above me in raw looks due to my confidence. It happens on the app, it’s just not as likely.
Using dating apps to meet women can be a great strategy for an attractive, busy man. But there’s also an easier, more fun way to meet women in real life.
And the method is… dance class. Dance class is a great way to meet women without having to chase them down like you do at the club. And you don’t need to spend so much of mental attention on the dating app.
With dance classes, you actually get to do something in person and do something that makes you better.
Benefits of dancing
Dancing has tons of benefits.
Amazing for brain health
Dancing has been shown to have numerous health benefits, including many cognitive advantages like preventing dementia. This is because you’re doing constantly learning something physical and mental at the same time. Combine that with having to be on rhythm with the music and now you have a full brain workout.
Dancing keeps the fire alive in long term relationships
Besides being a great way to meet women, dancing is an even better way to maintain relationships. Going to the club and dating apps can help you meet women, but that’s about it. They’ll do 0 to maintain your relations with the women after you’ve met.
On the other hand, dancing is a fun activity you can do as a first date, third date, or 20 years into a long term relationship. Many relationships die because the passion and excitement dwindles down. Adding something fun like dancing into your relationship can keep the fun, sexy energy alive that’s needed to maintain the fire in a long term relationship.
But isn’t dancing time consuming?
If you want to be a full on salsa dancer who performs like myself, then yes. But if you just want to learn how to dance, have some fun, and meet women who like you, then no.
You can go to a dance lesson once a week and meet women in your local area. Most lessons are about 45 minutes to an hour long. They’re usually held after work in the 6-8pm time frame, which means you don’t need to drink or stay up late in order to meet women.
Don’t I still have to chase the women?
Nope. In dance class, specifically latin dance like salsa or bachata, everyone dances with everyone. Well, all the guys dance with all the girls, with the exceptions of couples that show up and stick together.
So that means you don’t need to g chase or beg. Dancing with the girls is part of the class.
No need to beg
The great part about dance class is there’s no begging involved. You get to meet women who like you. Don’t even worry about the meeting women part. Just go to have a good time and learn how to dance.
You’ll be able to tell when you dance with the girls which of them have interest in you. They’ll blush a little more, hold you tighter, and seem like they don’t want to move on to the next person when the instructor says to switch partners. In contrast, women who aren’t interested will be polite and will dance, but won’t give you the same interest. You’ll learn a lot more about “choosing signals” by going to a few dance classes than you will reading 100 articles about it.
So what are you waiting for? While on this great journey of self improvement, semen retention, and rebelling against the societal programming to be weak, it’s fine to meet women. But don’t chase them. Go to a place where you can have a good time, be efficient, learn a new skill, and meet women who actually like you.