September 30

Toxic Woman: 5 Signs she’ll be Toxic in a Relationship


Toxic Woman: 5 signs she’ll be toxic in a relationship

Dealing with a toxic woman is never fun.  They’ll bring more drama into your life than you need and will only be a headache.

Especially if you make them your girlfriend.  Ideally you avoid toxic women all together.  However, it can be difficult to avoid having them in your life if you see a lot of women.

But you definitely need to recognize if a woman is toxic so you can avoid dating her long term, and ideally short term as well.

I get a ton of emails about relationships from guys dating clearly toxic women.

These relationships generally only last 3 months to a year, and from an outside perspective are clearly fucked up.  But many guys get addicted to these toxic women because some of them are hot, or the guys just have low standards for self respect.  Often times these women are the most attractive women a man can get and he’s out of his league.  Therefore he gets oneitis for this “beautiful creature” whose really just a girl whose toxic as fuck and is using him for validation, money, or other resources.

Toxic women vs bad leadership from a man

The word “toxic” gets thrown around a lot.

Just because a woman isn’t feminine towards you or the relationship isn’t working out, doesn’t mean she’s toxic.

If she was feminine when you met her and you started putting her on a pedestal + stopped passing shit tests, then it’s natural that she’s going to appear “toxic” to you over time.  In reality this is you losing frame, giving her the power, and then her taking the masculine role before dumping you.

While this is also all too common, the woman in this case wasn’t toxic naturally.  You just didn’t lead the relationship.  The relationship therefore became toxic after you failed to lead it.  Toxic relationships are in line with the law of polarity, which is why they are so common.

That being said, there are women who don’t allow themselves to be apart of toxic relationships.

These women generally only date a few guys in their lifetime, and have high quality relationships.  They generally are less forgiving of a man acting beta here and there.  This is why virgins and the idea of virginity is valued by men in today’s age and throughout history.  The innocence of virgins, or just less experienced women, gives a higher probability of loyalty because the women is more focused on making a relationship work versus looking for greener pastures.   That’s for another article though.

Signs of a truly toxic woman

I wanted to clear that up before we dive into the truly toxic women.

These are women that are destructive no matter how masculine and how much of a leader you are.  Masculine men in general can spot these girls and won’t tolerate their shit for long anyways, so you won’t ever see a masculine man – at least masculine with women – with a toxic woman for very long.  By having standards, he simply won’t allow her to stay in his life, unless he is trying to use her for something.  However, if you want greater peace, it’s best to let go of these toxic women.

But you will see beta males and weaker men deal with the consequences of dating a toxic woman.

He feel he can’t do better or he’s addicted to trying to fix her.  This is the hot and cold factor.  She has things that are wrong about her, but he sees her special talents or sees a chance she can be changed.

This is similar to women wanting to change the player or bad boy.

What makes them bad is often what makes them attractive.  Even though there are plenty of good girls, guys will often choose toxic women because it gives them a purpose.  They need to “fix” or “save” this girl.  That’s why having a real purpose that’s a business will force you to cut off toxic women and instead allow higher quality women into your life.

The rest of this article will dive into a few clear signs of a toxic girl so you can avoid jumping into a relationship and dramatically reducing the quality of your life.

1. Uses hard drugs

hard drugs - cocaine

Alcohol and weed are used by a lot of women and are fine in moderation.  But cocaine, xanax and other party drugs are a huge red flag.  If a girl regularly does cocaine, pops xanax or other pills, or takes other types of drugs, she’s definitely a toxic woman.

Because if she’s always doing this she likely has a problem with drugs themselves or is living a party lifestyle as her full time lifestyle.  These women are always a mess and can’t think with any kind of long term considerations in mind.

She can be fun to hook up with a few times, just make sure to wrap your dick up in some extra strong condoms.

But in all seriousness, you shouldn’t be fucking with women who are using hard drugs on the regular.  And you definitely shouldn’t make one of them your girlfriend.

2. Daddy Issues

Tons of women have daddy issues, and this is probably going to be the most common sign on this list.  It’s hard to avoid women with daddy issues if you’re in the dating game.

But be careful about making her your girlfriend.  While it’s not as bad as doing hard drugs all the time, a woman with daddy issues can be toxic by nature.  She didn’t get the fatherly love she wanted growing up and now carries that void with her wherever she goes.  Many toxic women come from broken homes with no father.

You can make these women very feminine around you if you’re a strong leader.  But don’t make the mistake of thinking you can fix her or save her.  Because then you’ll get invested into trying to help her, and she’ll only burn you.  Instead keep women with daddy issues in your rotation, but don’t make them a girlfriend.

Now if they had a grandfather, uncle, or step-dad who was a good role model then she might not have daddy issues even though her dad wasn’t there.  But if she had no consistent male role model in her life growing up, best believe that you’ll be trying to fill shoes that can’t be filled.

3. Stripper / Sugar Baby

If a woman was a stripper or a sugar baby (lightweight / more acceptable prostitute), no way in hell you should make her your girlfriend.  Obviously I don’t have to tell you not to make a street prostitute your girlfriend.  But I have guys ask me about strippers and sugar babies.  It’s hard to avoid ever sleeping with girls like this because most of the time you won’t know.  Many of the hot women men pedestalize are sugar babies.

I’m not here to judge women for making money with their bodies. They can do what they want.  However they also are toxic women when it comes to the dating game, let alone relationships.

Dealing with women who have made it their work to get money out of men is going to be a recipe for disaster.

How can you tell if she’s a sugar baby?

These toxic women will give themselves away.

Often times they’ll just tell you as a way to try to get you “to save them.”

Even if they conceal this, and you can’t pick up on the energy, there are clear real world signs.

Once you start seeing a girl for a while the signs will show.  Trips to Dubai, London, Hong Kong, a new Mercedes… and she works part-time at the mall?  That money has to come from somewhere.

These women who fuck directly for money are to be avoided for anything serious.  If you’re going to mess around with them then you must remain emotionally unavailable.  They’re used to using their sexuality to extract resources from men.  Sure, every woman wants a resource from a man (sex, money, security, affection, protection, all forms of validation), just like men want a resource from a woman (sex, affection, or even money as well).

But sugar babies and strippers do this in the most explicit form. They fuck and use their bodies to get money.  Never make one of these girls your girlfriend.  They are toxic women by default and if you catch feelings for one of these women you’re going to be used.

4. Many male friends

cock carousel

Along with daddy issues, this will be the 2nd most common sign you’ll notice that will let you know she’s a toxic woman.

A girl can have male friends socially.  And most have beta orbiters looking for attention.  But if she actively has straight male friends that she hangs out with then chances are she’s toxic.  This will be less obvious than the rest.  A girl with lots of male friends will seem more chill and down to earth than other girls.  However you must realize why she has a lot of guy friends.  She’s either fucking a lot of guys or using them for attention.

This is different than thirsty guys who chase her.  Those are guys who are in her face without her necessarily wanting it.  All attractive women have tons of guys that hit on her.  That’s normal, she can’t control that.

Male friends are back up options for her

But a woman with many male friends will pursue hanging out with them too.  She likely is fucking at least 1 of them, and uses others for back up dick or for validation.

She’s toxic if she has a lot of male friends because she’s always keeping other dick around and putting herself in a position to cheat or fuck around.

Regular women don’t need a bunch of male friends.  They might have gay male friends, but not straight dudes.  They know if they break up with you they can go out with their friends and meet a new guy that night.

Toxic women like to keep multiple straight male friends around.  All women are insecure to a degree, which is normal for humans to have some insecurities. And if your girl is even somewhat attractive, her male friends want to fuck her.  I don’t care what she says.  It doesn’t matter if she says “oh he’s not like that”.

Every straight guy wants to sleep with her

If she’s remotely attractive, you BEST believe that those guys have fucked, are fucking, or are waiting for the chance to fuck her.

Read that again.

As a guy, you know that you have the desire, no matter how virtuous you are, to fuck an attractive woman.  And these beta males are NOT virtuous, they just have no options.  If given the chance, the will fuck your girl and they’ll never tell you about it.

Toxic women are insecure to a degree where they need the constant male attention.  That will show up in the relationship and cause problems down the line.  These women are likely to cheat and monkey branch to one of the orbiters while she uses him until she finds a better man.

5. All of her exes are terrible

getting an ex back

This one is the hardest to decipher.  Many normal women will complain about exes to an extent.  However feminine women will only have a few and may have been cheated on or screwed over.  But they won’t harp on exes for too long.  Where as toxic women will make their exes out to be the devil and constantly talk about them.

Regular woman

If she discusses mistakes she made then she’s likely just hung up on an ex and not necessarily toxic.

Toxic woman

But if all of her exes are “evil” and she’s always the victim, best believe she’ll say the same thing about you when you two are no longer together.

Many of these dudes were probably normal dudes who are being painted as demons by this toxic woman whose playing the pity card with you.

Don’t believe it.  A girl can always date a “bad guy” once by mistake.  But if all of her exes are bad, then she either had really bad taste in men, or more likely, she’s playing the victim and making them sound much worse than they were.

Run, don’t walk.

Don’t wife up a toxic woman

toxic women - man avoiding a woman

Don’t make a toxic woman your girlfriend.  You know it’s not going to end well.  Never be so desperate for a relationship or consistent pussy that you allow yourself to catch oneitis for a woman you know will drag you down in life.

All women can cheat, be passive aggressive, and surely all will test your strength, some more than others.  But that doesn’t make them toxic, that’s just female nature.  However if you’re a strong man, you can lead a normal woman in a healthy way where you both win from a relationship.

Not with a toxic woman.  The signs will be clear in the first few months if not weeks or even moments of knowing her.  Don’t ignore them.

She has tons of family issues?

Or she does cocaine?

All of her exes are the devil?

She was a stripper or sugar baby?

This should be obvious but unfortunately I have to call it out directly based on questions I get.  If you said yes to any of these questions, you already know that you’re dealing with a toxic woman who will being you down.  Don’t get in a relationship with these girls.  Keep your vibration high and if you’re going to get a girlfriend, make sure she’s girlfriend material.


toxic, toxic girls, toxic woman, toxic women

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3 years ago

Hi J, i really like your articles.

I have experience with a toxic woman this year. She has daddy issues. Guess, you right dude! too much drama. She just blamed me for everything, even i don’t know my mistake.

Even she was really good at sex, we decide to broke up with few weeks ago because i don’t know whats wrong with her. No regret, i feel better now. I hope i can move on from her asap.

(sorry for bad english, i am from south east asia)

Just I
Just I
2 years ago

Change your ways. Or be 37 in college, as I am.
So long story short. Don’t be an idiot. They can and will ruin your life.
5 years out, after 11 in.

2 years ago

Great article and man I was a beta smh. My last girlfriend was beyond toxic but I can’t complain because she was a stripper, cam girl, later discovered a prostitute and worked in Vegas, had daddy issues, and likely did escorting at one point who knows. Now she’s a hair stylist. I tried to fix her which was dumb as hell. You can’t fix fatal errors. Anyways, great article; keep preaching the truth

2 years ago

Oh man was I naive. I had been lucky to have mostly stable girlfriends before in hindsight. Toxic to the T. Admitted to working in a stripclub yrs ago but it was “ok” because she was a waitress. I thought being a just a bartender in a large casino well wth, how bad can she be? Daddy issues of dating older men w/ a complex to be babied or provided for because alcoholic Dad was MIA early, a cold on affection Mom who subsequently raised her to focus on her beauty. Had almost 90% male friends some of whom were… Read more »

Last edited 2 years ago by HIM
2 years ago

Honestly anybody that’s looking at this article that should probably tell you something.

1 month ago

As an older guy I’ve been through all the shit. Way wise to it but I’ve never heard it put in context like you have done in a gifted manner! I had a “friend” like that one time she checked every one of those boxes I always wondered a little bit about the coke because she vehemently denied it. To this day she still shoots me a text every once in awhile and I love knowing how toxic and disgusting she is as I’m being nice to her!!

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