Your Wife should never be your Best Friend
No, your wife should not be your best friend.
But for all my married men, this post is for you. To men with girlfriends, this also applies. Just replace the word “wife” with girlfriend as you’re reading this.
Leader in the relationship
As the man, you’re the leader in the relationship. It’s your job to make the big decisions. Guide her and the direction of the relationship.
You can’t do that if your wife is your best friend. True best friends look at things equally and come to a conclusion together when making a decision. You can do this a male best friend.
But you can’t do this with a woman. The dynamics of male and female relationships ships are such that one person has to make the decision. It’s just the way nature works.
And if you’re not making the decisions, then you’ll realize something.
She’ll become your master
She’ll start making the decisions for you. What car to drive, what car to buy her, what city to live in, what house to buy. Vacations to go on, and so forth.
Eventually, trying to make your wife into your best friend will transform her into your master. She’ll become the leader be default. And she’ll hate you for it. She’ll unknowingly start to ruin the relationship until one leaves you, you leave her, or the two of you are too old to leave your miserable relationship.
Keeping her attracted to you
It’s one thing to be a player or playboy and get laid with different women.
All you have to do is be attractive enough to fuck, and then maintain those girls as fuck buddies for as long as you can if you want to.
It’s low stress because there’s always a lot of women. When one is too annoying or starts burning out, you can get rid of her.
But with a wife – assuming you’re loyal – she’s the only one you’re fucking. And if you want to keep her attracted to you, you can’t be her best friend. Believe it or not, women don’t want to fuck their best friend. They want to fuck the hot, alpha male.
Maintaining attraction is essential
It’s crucial that your wife stays attracted to you. If not, then she will likely cheat on you. And then you could end up with kids that aren’t yours. As well as a nice divorce rape to ruin your life.
That’s why you need to maintain attraction.
You can’t maintain strong sexual attraction with your best friend. And if you somehow can, she definitely can’t.
Keeping your wife from becoming your best friend
So how do you keep your wife, or even girlfriend, from becoming your best friend?
The number tool you have in your arenas to prevent your girl form becoming your best friend is your purpose.
Your purpose is always your #1 priority in life.
And if you don’t make your purpose, then she’ll take the place of it. You’ll devote your life to her. She’ll friendzone you while you’re dating or married. This is when she starts to refer to you as her best friend.
In order to avoid this and the beginning of the end of your relationship, you need to develop your purpose.
Your purpose is something that
- makes your money and has the potential to build wealth
- love or enjoy doing
- have a natural strength in
With a purpose, you’ll gain money, success, fulfillment, and happiness.
Your purpose will allow you to give back to the world and also gain from it.
I talk about it so much in these articles because it’s essential for living your best life. And it’s absolutely essential for keeping your wife attracted to you. She needs to be with a leader. A man who’s ambitious and determined. Because a man that makes his wife his purpose puts her on a pedestal.
And she hates that with a passion.
Having other friends
Many times it’s not just the woman trying to friend zone you, even though you’re in a relationship.
I’ve seen so many relationships where it’s the guy who’s trying to make the wife or girlfriend into his best friend. The reason he does this is because he cuts off his real best friend, or his friends in general. And then he doesn’t have any male friends.
As men, we thrive in brotherhood with other men. I’m find spending time alone, and prefer to do so. But I still enjoy having a strong brotherhood with the men.
Having genuine friendships is important. And yet many men cut off their bros, boys, whatever you want to call their friends.
Then they try to make their wife or girlfriend play the role of best friend. This is a huge mistake. And guys do it to themselves.
Not all your eggs in one basket
When you put all your human social needs in one person, like a wife, then you are putting your eggs in one basket. You’ll have no one to turn you when she dumps your ass.
And you’ll develop a wicked case of oneitis.
Instead, you spread this out. You have your wife/girlfriend, multiple friends, family, and so on. So if you break up, get divorced, or lose certain friends, then you always have other people life.
I’m not saying you need to be a bitch and tell your friends all your problems. But it’s a very nice thing just to have some quality friends to get a beer with or just hang out.
Women do this well
Women are amazing at having concrete social circles to back them up. Whenever they’re fighting or going through a break up, they have options. We talk about women branch swinging in the red pill community. It’s true women usually have other guys to fuck. But they also have multiple friends and family members to talk to and do stuff with.
As men, we’re not going to have the same human resources as a woman, let alone an attraction of woman. But we also can have friends that like us for our genuine personalities. Women can as well, but they often don’t know who their real friends are. Which is why they have a need to have so many.
Have a social life and bros as your best friends
But what men can learn is that having social circles, whether it’s a best friend, or just some decent friends, can help out a ton.
It’s not just good for when the relationship ends or is bad. It will help you to keep busy, above your own life, and not put all your social needs in you wife. You’ll therefore have a higher chance of your relationship working out. And if it doesn’t, you’ll still be better off when it’s over.
Connection vs. Best Friend
Just because she’s not your “best friend”, doesn’t mean you two can’t have a close bond. In fact, you should have an incredible connection. Unlike that of all your other relationships with family, friends, and so on.
But it’s not “friendship”. You can be friends on some level.
However, your connection is that of opposites.
You’re the powerful, masculine, dominate man. Your energy is that of creation, producing, accomplishing, and achieving. Ambition is your middle name.
Hers is that of femininity, softness, loving. She should have energy that’s nurturing, supportive, and open to you. That way you can fuck here, and make love to her, physically and emotionally.
A powerful connection is what women crave. As men, it adds value to our lives as well. But never mistake this intense bond with a lover to be that of friendship.
Because the moment you make your wife your best friend, is the moment you start losing your masculinity in the relationship. And then it’s a matter of time before the relationship goes down hill.